Everyone I’ve mentioned my upcoming move to France with seem to have the same question followed by the same response:
Q: “Do you know anyone over there already?”
A: “No.”
R: “Wow!! So you’re just going?”
Of course I am! Wouldn’t you?
But perhaps they wouldn’t. I don’t feel unique because I have the sense that I can just go while they feel content to be settled. But I do know that I feel particularly unsettled when someone tries to bring up the idea of settling. I also can’t see myself living in any one place for a long period of time and even wonder if living in one city in France for too long would begin to make me feel antsy. I also don’t understand the idea of having a hometown, I don’t know what it’s like to have no desire to move, and I don’t know what it’s like to be from any one place.
While others seem content to go about their daily routines, I’m always looking for ways to shake things up a bit and break out of the “norm” – even routines that become my own “norm.”
I want to travel. I want to explore. I want to discover.
Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance, can their be recovery.
I don’t know where this internal interest to understand what others frequently misunderstood comes from, but no amount of time goes by where I don’t enjoy talking about cultures, discussing cultural differences, and trying to understand the “why” behind the different things that people do that often lead to culture clashes when one meets the other. Aside from art (which encompasses the same ideas), this is my passion and purpose – not to convince others that we should all be more of the same (even within our own country), but to help others see the beauty in the one area where we will always be the same: through our differences.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that I enjoy the ultimate learning experience when it comes to venturing out into a world unfamiliar to you. There is nothing else like breaking out of your comfort zone; you meet the most amazing people, the more times you do it, the less difficult it becomes, and you’ll most likely never look back with regrets… that is unless you choose not to go.
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
I think some people will always feel threatened and uncomfortable when speaking to people who can just take their suitcase and relocate, just like that.
For some people home is where they were born and raised and for some of us it’s wherever we choose to live for the moment. I think all have parts of two different types of ancient lifestyles/mindsets in us: The Nomad and The Settler/Farmer.
Bon voyage!
//Tomas
Great point! And that’s so true – people do seem threatened. I wonder what the root of the fear is.
Most people are stuck in fear. At 1st I was annoyed, then I realized I had a lot of pity for them. They are missing out on the best things in life!!!
I feel sorry for them too. I used to be really annoyed when people would say they’ll come visit but then never even make plans or try to make it happen. Don’t bother with the polite formalities that are really only there to soften the goodbye. Just wish me well and let’s continue down our separate paths. Unless you really are going to come visit, then we’ll talk.
It all makes me appreciate the woman I’ve become.
You just gotta get out there and do what you think will make you happy, keep you learning. If it ends up being anything other than completely fulfilling and formative, you have the comfort of knowing you can pack up and return home – or wherever it is that you feel at peace.
Thanks for the encouraging words, Lindsey. It’s so very true! I just have work on figuring out where I call home. Living in Paris and France came the closest. California would be my close second.
I think the fear almost always comes from inside person expressing the fear. They see other peoples actions as some sort of statement about their own life. Maybe they wish that had they opportunity or curage to have moved themselves, maybe they just don’t realise it?
Or maybe they truly are content not moving around in life? With travel, you never knew you wanted it until you do it – then you “get the bug” and can’t have enough of those great, eye opening moments. But if your eyes were never opened, what would be the point?
Coming from a small town in southern Louisiana, I can relate. When I was younger, and in the military, I was returning from a deployment in Saudi Arabia and had a layover at an airport in Shannon, Ireland. That’s where I caught the “bug”. And even though my opportunities to travel since then have been virtually non-existent, I still have a strong desire to do so (and I will one day). However, I do have family members who find my desire to travel abroad to be the most peculiar thing that they’ve ever heard of. “Why would you wanna go all the way over there, when you have everything you need right here?”, they ask me. So, while they look at me in bewilderment for wanting to travel overseas, I often look at them with the same bewilderment foe exactly the opposite reason. I guess to those of us who have “caught the bug”, we will never be understood by those who haven’t.
-Joshua
Very true. I remember a couple who “took me under their wings” when I was about 14. They let me housesit for three weeks while they traveled throughout Europe. They brought me back unique gifts as a thank you: glass from Milano, afghans from France, and rich stories of their journeys. I had just returned from 3 weeks in Japan and was learning Japanese and enjoying using chopsticks for every meal – they smiled and informed me that I had it, I’d caught the bug. And they warned I would never be cured. They were right.
The ones that do get it are treasures in and of themselves. Hang on to them if you can.